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22 January, 2012

Epiphanies at the Strange Hours of the Night

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There are so many strange things about a person’s mind.  Mine for example, works at extreme speeds for clearly the wrong reasons.  If I get bored, it depresses me.  If I get depressed, I assume that I’m not depressed, but I’m trying to tell myself I’m depressed to make the situation better.  Once I’ve thought of this, I realize that I’ve just had an extensive debate over myself on whether or not I’m depressed, and I come to the conclusion that I might be going slightly insane.  This, of course, frightens me to no end, because nobody likes to feel like their own mind is telling them that they are in a state of delusion.  (At least I’m aware of it?)  And then I end up thinking that I’m quite the idiot to think that I deserve to label myself with self-diagnosed mental deficiencies and I end up choosing a movie at random from our cabinet.  Today, it was Eddie Murphy’s Daddy Day Care, which, last time I saw it, I was eighth.

Anyway, as I was watching this movie, to try to really get my distracted, I remembered how much I missed the blogging community.  I also remembered that it has changed.  That things are terribly depressing (or, well, not as much, as we’ve all come to realize I throw this word out a lot.  Huh—I should add that to my ‘About Me’).  But then, during the scene where Eddie Murphy’s character is reading “Green Eggs & Ham” to the kids, I had an epiphany:

Why is it that I give so much attention and thought to what the outcome of my personal choices will be?  I shouldn’t.  I won’t.

I don’t know—but hey!  Look at all the oranges we bought!  I’ve eaten twelve already!  And that drawing on my window—that’s from last year, so I could always remember the horrid day I got braces.

Goshdarnit, it’s EXACTLY twelve a.m., and I wanted to post this before 11:59.

3 comments :

  1. I do miss the blogging community, and it's really hard to get myself back into the swing of things again. Has it changed so much from 2009 to now, in our little corner? OH MY GOD YOU'VE GIVEN ME AN IDEA FOR A POST HANG ON A SEC

    Once I've got it up, you can steal my idea or write something along the lines of it if you want, I'm letting you do that. You're welcome.

    Eleanor Roscuro

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    Replies
    1. I know! I totally miss 2009-early 2010 Blogspot. Everyone was such a tight-knit community that simply wanted to record their lives down, without worrying about getting noticed. Blargh blargh blargh. Miss you!

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  2. Well, I veered off track a bit there, but I wrote it: http://apostrophe-rules.blogspot.com/2012/02/dear-lnr.html

    I know! And we were all learning about blogging together, and everything you said is so true dammit

    Miss you too! I'll drop you an email sometime. Sorry for the wait!

    Eleanor Roscuro

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Thank you, pal.